Splitting responsibility

I've noticed a lot recently how much my significant other does not help out around the house. Even if I ask him to take out the trash it'll sit there for three days because he won't do it and I end up having to be the one to do it. We've been together almost a year and he's done the dishes literally three times.

Now I don't want to sound ungrateful because I know he works very hard at his job which requires some physical labor. But I also work full-time as well. I'm a nanny and I take care of three children, who all have some form of handicap. Along with taking care of the children I'm in charge of making sure the whole house is taken care of, meals are made, laundry done, dishes, chores, helping the older two with their homework. So the last thing I want to do when I come home is housework of my own. But I come home and do it anyway and while I'm doing that he just sits in his recliner and watches TV.

I want to try to talk to to him about it, but I don't know how to without him getting angry. He has a tendancy to throw my job under the bus and say I don't work as hard as him. Anyone have any advice on how I could go about it without making him feel like I'm nagging at him or accusing him of never helping?