Bitterness rant

I feel so selfish and hateful but I can not stand to be around pregnant ppl or newborns because I have tried for so long! I won't even have anything to do with my own sisters when they are prego and they seem to understand but I'm afraid I am gonna end up a lonely bitter person if I never have babies . I am so tired of watching ppl have kids when that is all I yearn for! Why does God give addict and junkies babies and not deserving loving ppl like us who have all the love and affection to give ???