Experience with Donors?

Question

My husband and I are TTC baby #1, but he is transgender, so this isn't something we can do by ourselves. We're not in the position financially to use a sperm bank, so we've been considering male friends to ask. Most of the guys we asked said yes, but never followed through, or changed their mind after talking with their wives (which we understand completely. Everyone needs to be 100% sure!)
​We're meeting with a very close friend of the family (who said he'd be honored to help!) tomorrow to discuss the details of how this will happen. I'm afraid to get my hopes too high.. Apparently it's easy to say yes.. But actually showing up to do their part seems to be an entirely different monster. 
​Has anyone dealt with anything like this before? Does anyone have any advice to maybe make him feel more  comfortable with following through? He knows better than most people just how badly we want to start our family.. Part of me worries that that may put too much pressure on him. Idk. I guess I'm just really nervous after getting my hopes so high so many times already, just to get burnt in the end. We really want this to work, and he's the ideal donor. What to do what to do. Thank you for any advice/ideas! <3

Answer

If you can I would get legal papers drawn up to relinquish any rights to the child...that maybe a reason why others haven't followed through. I also honestly think a donor who is not a close friend might be easier too. 
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Answer

I have zero experience here but I would think you'd have better luck going through someone you don't know personally. Someone who's literally a donor, knows what's involved, and has already made that decision.

As far as resources, I haven't got anything to suggest but I'm sure there are reputable sites out there with lots of options.

Answer

You might also look into the Known Donor Registry (just search google), it's an online community connecting willing donors to those seeking (on a personal level outside of a sperm bank). I was seeking out resources before my situation changed and this was one option I found. Sometimes going with people you personally know can cause longterm issues, but if it's someone you trust who you know is a good fit and you're comfortable with, that can be good, so I really wish you luck. I'm so sorry you've been let down so far. :(

Answer

I wish I could give you some advice but unfortunately I don't so I would just like to wish you the best and I really hope things work out.

Answer

I'm so sorry it's been such a difficult journey with donors so far. :(

I can vouch for KDR, I found my donor there a few years ago. :) I would ask him directly if there's anything you can do to make him feel more comfortable. You're probably already meeting with him by now though... I wish you and your DH the very best in your ttc journey. I hope this donor is the one!! :)

Experience with Donors?

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