Im giving up ...its hard and depressing

Me and my bf are both 24 and trying for our first my period was suppose to come on the 25th it didnt but the 29th I had light spotting but now its just a light period I never have light ones . my bf got me a test. I never took it because I started spotting . he told me he knew I wasn't pregnant and just laughed it hurt my feelings that he just laughed so I'm just giving up and putting all my energy into getting fit TTC is taking over my life and its depressing maybe its not meant for me to be a mom