Real want to have a baby! :(

I have really wanted a baby ever since I me and my boyfriend of 6 years have been together now please don't judge me and keep your horrible comments to your selfs but when we had just got together I fell pregnant we were both so happy but due to our living conditions and health problems we sadly decided to have an abortion, and to explain the health problems I am a carrier of muscular dystrophy and our child if a boy would of had a lot of problems but every day since then I have regretted it and I see all these other people getting pregnant and having there baby's but it has gotten worse since my sister has had a lovely baby girl and now all I can think about is when can I have my chance again it's been 5 years but my boyfriend says he wants to have our own place before we have a child but I just want my own child to love and care for. Some nights I cry myself to sleep but I can't talk to him and I can't talk to my family I feel like I'm going mad please if you can help in any way I would be thankful I can't be the only one who feels like this xx