Disappointed....

I think i am finally giving up on the whole baby making thing. I have 2 beautiful kids that I should be so thankful for and if it's destined for me to stop there I'm ok with that. We lost a baby in July and have been trying since with no luck. I hate feeling like I can't have anymore babies and I try and find different reasons why. I get angry cause my SO smokes like a train and I want to blame it on him, I get ovarian cysts quite often so I blame myself for not ovulating correctly. It's getting to be too much emotionally and I'm beyond disappointed and just want to give up! I'm sorry there's no question here I just needed to say it to someone, and what better way to express this than on a group of people who I'm sure can relate to how I'm feeling. Thank u for reading this whoever takes the time and I wish u all, all the luck and baby dust in the world ♡