Tell husband’s gf about HERPES?

I’ll try to make this short. My soon to be ex husband has a girlfriend who I just met a couple of weeks ago. We talked and she wanted to know why we’re getting divorced and she told me a little about their issues. She’s already experiencing some of the things I went through with him such as lying or withholding information (like she had just found out the prior week that he was married 🙄), and him being inappropriate online with other women. I’ve had herpes for 16 years and 10 years ago when he and I first met, I obviously disclosed that information to him and he was fine with it. He’s never been tested but there was this one time he thought he may had been having an outbreak. This was YEARS ago. I decided to text him after meeting her and tell him that I really liked her. Then I told him that although it may not be any of my business that he should disclose that there is a very big possibility he has herpes. He never responded. I know he hasn’t told her because that’s the type of person he is. I feel bad because if it were me I’d like to know but I also feel like it’s not my business. He and I are already at odds and I don’t want to make things worse between us but I’m also a girls-girl 🤦🏽‍♀️. Any advice?

Is it wrong to have kids to “complete you”? I feel like my life will really matter until I have kids

I’m 24, going on 25 in a few months. I’m sitting here crying as I type this but I get the feeling that my life will never really matter until I have kids/become a mother. Nobody really likes me. Even the relationships/men I date don’t really like/love me, they’re just using me for sex and think I’m pretty. Even if they stay around, I’ve never had a man love me for anything more than surface level. My last boyfriend said his favorite feature of mine was my “big boobs”. For context, I have no friends, half and most of my family doesn’t like me/doesn’t acknowledge me, my siblings don’t like me and my little brother barely tolerates me but he hates me too. Like if I just up and died right now nobody aside from my mother would actually be upset, my brother would probably feel relieved. My sister hates my guts and won’t even let me apologize or talk to me b/c she feels like I’m a “horrible” person even though I’ve given money to her and helped her out even when I didn’t have to. Every single friend I’ve had has stabbed me in the back, betrayed me. I even had a girl who I considered a “close friend” straight up black my eye on my birthday a few years back. I know nobody likes me, I’ve always had that feeling since I was a kid. I’ve never had any true genuine friend in this world, the most genuine “friend” I’ve ever had is my mother and that’s really sad. People talk about me, people have said horrible things about my looks, I’ve been called “Michael Myers” by other black girls because I have thin lips and a pointy nose (I’m biracial for context). I’m also not good at anything, I’m not good at sports, I’m not some super educated Harvard graduate or particularly smart. That’s why I feel like my life won’t matter until I have children, I feel like they’ll be the only ones that truly appreciate me/love me and appreciate my existence. They’ll be the only ones that appreciate what I do for them, they’ll be the only ones that won’t judge me or talk about how funny looking they think I am (hopefully), they’ll be the only ones that care truly. They’ll be the only ones in the world that don’t have bad intentions for me besides my mom. That’s not based in lust, or based in physical attraction or infatuation. I know some people will say that’s unhealthy, but nobodies lived my life to see how genuinely bad people are to me. I’m a sweet, loving kind person and I’d give the shirt off my back for the people I love and have done it before yet life has decided to show me that I’m not worthy of anything but being treated horrible by people that I’ve been good to. Nobody understands how I’ve always felt like since I was a little girl that I don’t really “belong”. I feel like once I have my kids, whether I’ll be a single mother or not — I’ll be complete, I’ll belong, I’ll have something that normalizes me to other people hopefully. I had a miscarriage in spring of 2024, and it was with my ex and while we’re not even together — I was so sad when the miscarriage happened because I wanted that baby. I would’ve loved it so much.

am i the asshole for cutting ties

Hi, everyone. I’m a college student, and I’ve been wondering if I’m the asshole for deciding to cut ties with my friend group. Here's some backstory, and I’d really appreciate your thoughts.The group consisted of five girls: myself, my best friend from high school, and three other girls (Jamie, Taylor, and Emily) who lived in the same apartment building as us at the time. Taylor, Emily, my best friend and I stay in the same apartments building this year but Jamie is somewhere different this year. Things started off fine—we’d all hang out together, and I thought we were decent friends. We even went on a trip to Miami together during spring 2024, and there were no issues to my knowledge. However, things began to shift around spring 2024, and I started noticing behaviors that rubbed me the wrong way.Jamie and Taylor became roommates, and they started going on “friend dates” without the rest of us. It wasn’t something simple like grabbing a quick bite—it was full-on outings that they didn’t tell us about or invite us to. I’ll admit, my roommate (my best friend from high school) and I occasionally went places without the group, but it was just to grab fast food nearby, nothing major. I felt like their exclusion was intentional and different.The Trip That Changed Everything
In summer 2024, Taylor invited the group to her home, which was about 2-3 hours away from me and my best friend. Initially, it was supposed to be just the five of us staying at her place with her parents. However, two weeks before the trip, Taylor decided to invite her high school friends too, turning it into a much larger gathering. Suddenly, it went from a small trip to nine girls and her parents in one house.I wasn’t comfortable going anymore for a few reasons:* I didn’t know her friends and didn’t feel okay being in cramped sleeping quarters with them.* My mom wasn’t comfortable with me driving out of state.* I didn’t have a job to pay for the trip, and I wasn’t going to ask my parents to fund it when they were already paying for school and other expenses.My best friend didn’t go either for similar reasons. She wasn’t thrilled with me for backing out, but ultimately, we were both on the same page about not going. Also, my friend and I communicated our issues with Taylor adding her additional guest and a surface level she seemed as if she understood.Other Incidents* For my birthday, I initially told the group I didn’t want to do anything but later decided to have a dinner at an upscale restaurant. Everyone agreed to come, but when I changed the date because of phone issues, Jamie and Taylor acted like they never knew about the plans. When I rescheduled to Sunday (to avoid overlapping with Taylor’s birthday), Taylor refused to come, saying she had a meeting. She eventually showed up but barely interacted with me, and the vibe felt off. With Jamie feeding off of Taylor they didn’t even take pictures with me.* I hosted a campus event through an organization I’m part of and invited the group to come support. Only my best friend showed up. Emily had work, which I understood, but Jamie lived in the same building where the event was held and didn’t bother to come. Taylor’s excuse? She needed to “set up her iPad.” To add the event was PJ theme so Jamie could’ve came in here PJs and grab a bite to eat since food was provided.Homecoming Drama
Our school has a big homecoming, and everyone is encouraged to stick with a buddy for safety. Jamie and Taylor ignored me and my best friend the entire time, essentially dragging Emily along while leaving us out. At one point, they walked so far ahead of us on the way to Jamie’s apartment that the door locked before we could catch up. We only got inside because one of Taylor’s high school friends noticed us.At a pregame, they made us wait 40 minutes for Jamie’s other friends before heading to a party. Once at the party, they disappeared and left us behind. My best friend and I had to figure out how to get back to our Apartments alone while drunk.Final Thoughts
There’s more I could share, but these are the main incidents. My best friend has her own stories with them, but I’ll let her speak on her experience if she chooses to. After everything, I’ve distanced myself from Jamie and Taylor. I still feel bad, though, and wonder if I should have handled things differently.So, AITA for no longer being friends with them? Or could I have done something better in this situation?

I regret having another child

My youngest is 3 and I really wanted baby #2 but she is INSUFFERABLE. I know this sounds terrible but I literally can’t get anything done, we’re staying with family for a few months and they can’t stand all the screaming and crying. I spend 99% of the time trying to keep her quiet. It’s so difficult to find remote work because she’s always under me and won’t be quiet. I’ve had to leave jobs because of this before I’ve gotten fired. I’m pretty sure she has ADHD…I’ve raised other kids and I know how toddlers are…this is so different. I want to put her in daycare so I can work but I can’t find a daycare close by and because we’re so far out there aren’t any bus lines. I want to cry every second of every day because of the fact I need a second job but can’t find wfh opportunities fast enough of ideally one that doesn’t require phones (I’ll take anything atp), we’re staying with family and I hate it and trying to keep my kids quiet 24/7 is draining. I can’t help think how much easier everything would be if I didn’t want another baby. I understand it’ll get easier but I feel like I can’t move forward rn because of her behavior. I need to find somewhere to live where it’s just me and my kids so that I can’t move forward parent properly without family losing their shit because of the crying but there’s literally nowhere to go. I hate this and just needed to vent.

Relationship problems..

Not mama related me and my boyfriend have been together for 5+ years for reference I’m a stay home mom I only get the most for me to spend is 100$ while he works full time after he pays for he’s vehicle and stuff he has money left over if we go thru a drive thru I have no problem getting him things when he asks but when I ask it’s a big fight!! Do I have a reason to be mad at this?

Hot grits

My daughter (7) and I went to waffle house, as we were driving she tried to open the black and clear plastic container that had the bacon, eggs, toast and grits. I didn't know she was opening it and when she opened it the Hot grits that were in the bowl went all on her lap. She started screaming and I quickly wiped the grits off with my hand. When I pulled over her legs were red and the side has a small burn that's started blistering so I took her to urgent care and she ended up having 2nd degree burns. Well my question is what would you do? I already let the waffle house know but would y'all sue?

Marriage problems - help me

Sorry for the long post…I’ve been married for 9 years & with my husband for 14. There’s been many times over those years I’ve thought/wanted to leave but financially didn’t think I could. He’s a good person and I’ve tried to feel grateful for him & we have two beautiful children, the youngest just a year. Pretty much since the youngest was born I’ve been incredibly unhappy, we’ve been fighting more than usual and the final straw for me is the language he uses when he fight and I worry now that my eldest is getting older that he can hear him speak to me like that. He’s been living at his mums for the last 4 weeks and I said I’d give it til the end of August to make my decision, he hasn’t made any effort to change anything in that period and at the weekend I told him I was finished & nothing could change my mind. He’s since admitted this came as a shock and he didn’t think I’d go through with it, he says it’s hit home and he’s promised to change all the things that have been destroying our relationship and leading to the arguments…I don’t know whether to give him one final chance and then at least I know I did but in my heart I don’t know that I love him anymore & if it’s too little too late but I feel I owe it to my kids to give it one more shot. To complicate things further a guy I’ve known since I was a child told me he had feelings for me a few weeks ago, we were with a group of friends so I didn’t and couldn’t say anything in front of them, however we were primary school sweethearts, I’ve always had a crush on him and always felt there was a spark there even though nothing ever happened, even as teenagers. Part of me has always felt we should be together and I’ve fantasised about it for so long so scared of the opportunity passing I messaged him at the weekend and told him I had feelings for him too. I said that my marriage was over but I wasn’t wanting to do anything and wouldn’t be ready to for a while. He said to come back to him when I was ready. I feel like a dick now for even saying anything to him so soon but at the time my marriage was 100% over until my husband has now begged me for a second chance. I would never end my marriage for this other man as I don’t even know that we’d be good together or work out but I always felt I was looking a sign from him to know it wasn’t in my mind and it came. He’s going to think I’m even more of a dick if I’ve to tell him I’m giving my marriage another go but equally don’t want him to think I lied if we stay together.My mind is just in chaos. HELP ME!

Congratulations 🎉

We managed to raise my daughter well! She turned 18 today and I just found out she got 2 tattoos and is planning to get 2 more! I feel some type of way. I knew she was going to get the 2 that reminds her of both grandmothers. She was hiding them from me. Should I be upset. I already know she is 18…..

Am I overreacting ??

I’m sorry for the long story, I’ll keep it as short as possible. My children’s father and I split up 6 years ago, we co parent our kids who are 15, 11 and 8. We are both in long term relationships and for the most part things run smoothly. I’ve done my absolute best to stay friends, even suggesting all getting together for new years, bonfire night etc because I thought it would be nice for the kids,, to which my ex and his partner have refused every time. That’s their choice. Last year I suffered 2 miscarriages and at Christmas I was told by them that they were having a baby, which wasn’t planned and an abortion was considered. I didn’t take this news very well but composed myself after a few days and actually got excited that my children were to have a new baby sister. I even bought the baby gifts. Roll on tho 3 weeks ago and I am 10 weeks pregnant and early scans show all is progressing well 🤞. I get a call from my ex stating that their newborn baby is very poorly with whooping cough but they have asked a doctor and there is no risk to my unborn as our children had been around the baby. I’ve done all I can to make things easy on them while their daughter has been so poorly. Last weekend it was the children’s turn to be with him and as the baby was home and settled they said it was fine to have them. They stayed with his mum on the Friday night and then come Saturday afternoon I had a really vile txt from him stating how selfish I am, other vile names and how he never wants to speak to me again,, because I apparently sent our son there with a cough. I must stress that when I dropped our son to school Friday morning there was absolutely nothing wrong with him, he stayed with his man that night and then was picked up by his dad Saturday afternoon. They said I sent him there with a cough on purpose knowing their baby has whooping cough. I’m sooooooo upset by this, I’ve been blocked by them and all their family,, all week I’ve been crying over this and can’t get it out of my head. For the record they both smoke 20 a day each and she refused the whooping cough vaccine while pregnant. Am I to blame? Am I overreacting?

Hot girl Summer Fr

So my younger brother is an artist so I’m always at his events he has a friend that’s the same age tad bit old then me but yall get what I’m saying. So long story short I let his friend know I was feeling him and we hit it off with a bottle of tequila good music and a vibe. The just kept being great in secret way… but this man is just beautiful to me then when i told him im late everything changed no more sex and we can still be cool as long as i don’t make it weird is what he said. So now I’m waiting to go and essentially get told that I’m having a baby because birth control and plan b both failed me … but I’m a mix of emotions because his ex cheated on him got pregnant by someone else and now he insecure…. I’m going to let him know the outcome of the appt but should I just drop him a around because I can’t send this baby back to heaven when my ex did that too me after my daughter was born ? Just emotional

what’s the right thing to do?

so lately i’ve been going through a rough spot. especially with my boyfriend.. we broke up or took a break whatever about 3 weeks ago because we’ve been stressed out and we take things out on each other and we believed space would help with that. note, we’ve been together for 3 years. i am 22 and he just turned 26. there are times that i feel like im not really ready to settle down or give up socializing with my friends in order to fit his expectation of what he wants me to be. and he’s expressed he also feels like he wants to be free sometimes too but that changes frequently as he says he wants us to grow together and make each other better which i think is beautiful but i think sometimes it’s okay to grow on your own and there are things we need to work on within ourselves on our own time. it can’t be forced or the process can’t be sped up just cause that’s what we want. so.. sorry this is getting long.. like i said we broke up for space but he’s cried to me and expressed he wants to try to work it out and accuses me of forgetting the past 3 years and wanting to give up just because im not sure how to go about things. i don’t wanna lose him but i don’t think i should have to give up growing on my time or giving up seeing my friends. what do i do?? what is right?? i feel like i can feel both sides and hurting him hurts me but i also wanna make the right decision for myself. is seeing my friends really more important than a possible future with him?? and i know me and him have a beautiful relationship he really does makes me better.. and i really love him very very much but im so confused

Teacher vs preschooler

So I made a post yesterday explaining the situation at my new job about a teacher, dragging a student across the playground due to him not listening. I’m fairly new at this job. I want to say I’m barely on my third week and this happened last Friday the dragging of the student. Everyone on the post told me that I should bring this up to the Director. Which I will. since I am fairly new here I’m still in training for mandated reporter. I know for sure. I will be letting the Director know but my question is should this be reported? Once I complete my mandated reporter training I can report to higher ups meaning like CPS in them for any suspected abuse. I guess my question is would this one incident qualify? I am a mother and I would definitely report this, but I guess I’m looking at it from another view, thinking of this teachers career technically being over with due to my fault

Teacher vs preschoolers PLEASE HELP

I recently got hired at a preschool early center and the main teacher/ supervisor I’ve caught on is a bit cold with the students (ages 3-5). Now I understand kids these age can be hard with not listening and throwing tantrums so I can kinda understand the stern voice. But on Friday a child wasn’t listening to get off the slide after multiple times asked so she took it apon herself to grab the child’s arm and DRAG him off the slide and off the play ground. The child was crying in distress and would escape her and she would go back and drag him by the arm. I’ve never worked in child development. My first thought was to be angry and also in disbelief. I myself as a parent would NOT be ok with this. I need advice. Is this or was this ok? She literally DRAGGED him. I feel like I need to talk to the director. I’m not sure what their protocols are for Children who don’t listen. But dragging wouldn’t be the solution?? Right?!!??

Porn…. Controversy

So…I personally don’t like porn. I hate the fact that my man is okay getting off looking at other women. Sexualizing it. It’s cheating to me personally. Id you watching your relationship more power to you. It’s just not for me. I also have an extremely high sex drive and I’m always down to do BJ, or do whatever. I’ve explained 2x to my Fiance I don’t like porn in our relationship. The last 2 weeks- I was gone for 4 days visiting my mom and then 4 days later we were back but I had to do a colposcopy so we haven’t had sex in 2 weeks but I’ve given BJ’s and I’ve initiated etc To do other things. I was on my man’s phone looking something up and on his history I saw porn sites. (Doesn’t even hide it) So I dug deeper after. It’s been happening for weeks and I had no idea. His excuse when he worked on night shift and I was at work was “I’m never around when he’s horny so it’s just easier.”I’m just so sad….idk is it disrespectful that he is doing this and he told me he would stop and that it won’t happen anymore. Now I see he’s doing it 😕 I never look on his phone I trust him fully. Some women say it’s better than him cheating. Wtf

What does this mean????

Haven’t heard from my Dr yet and I am always worried and filled with anxiety. Anyone know how to read the results?? Thank you!!!!

Negative Tests, but…

So. I’m probably just being crazy and eating too much with stress of going back to work, however I feel pregnant…. I’ve taken a dozen tests last month all negative. Took 2 tests this month negative. We aren’t trying per say, but there was a day one day past ovulation day that could have been it. I’m 9 month postpartum, nursing, gone back to work, have two older kiddos…Baby born end of Aug, period started back up in Oct. 2-4 weeks apart. April hits and was 21 days past expected period and was heavy for a solid day and then just stopped. No petering start or ending to it. Now this month (May) I’m currently 7 days past expected period. I asked last month to have a confirmation of pregnancy appointment, but since I had a period they had me cancel it. Thoughts? What would you do?

So I think this is it…🤭

I need to know, this is so tmi. Buttttt me and my bf has been trying for two months and every time I go crazy and have so much symptoms it seems like. Now I’m not showing any symptoms this month, no symptoms from ovulation and I just need to know, is this implantation bleeding?? I am at 7 dpo.

How would you feel?

My sister in law is getting married in July. Granted her mom has been passed away for 3 going on 4 years. I used to babysit her when she was a baby. I said all of that to say she told me that she would let me be a part of picking her wedding dress. I reached out today to check on her and she told me she already got her dress. How would you feel? Should I feel some type of way?

Sahm and career day

So my 8 year old son is having a career day in a couple weeks. My husband can’t make it and I’m a sahm. I’ve been debating on going or not cause I don’t really have a job. I know that being a sahm is a job in a sense but I also feel like the stuff I do (cooking, cleaning, taking care of kids) is what working parents also have to do on top of their job. I feel like my biggest job is just basically taking the household work load off of my husband when he gets off(he is a great husband and still helps when needed). Anyways, I’ll probably go regardless just to be there for my son. My question is though, do you think it’s kind of silly for a sahm to go in and talk about their “job” on career day?

Going to get fired because i wont be bullied to work the last hour of my shift due to daycare closing early

I work part time in customer services and i have worked for this company for 2 years. I am a single mum and my son is 7, i get no suppprt when it comes to people watching him so i am his sole carer / provider. Very recently the afterschool club changes and is now held at the school meaning they open until 5:30, however i noticed on the day before half term it was only open until 4:30 which school confirmed and unfortunately i am on late shift which is 1pm till 5pm and i told my manager straight away. She told me she is going to discuss this with the director because no one can cover between 4 till 5pm. She told me they cant change the shift, i explained that theres no option but to get my son from school or he will be left outside alone and social services will be involved.. they dismissed this and kept repeating themselves. They tried to get me to book it off as a holiday but i cant as i have none left and i got told im not being fair on the other people...... they are now going to be having a meeting with HR and higher management as they cant "substain " this any more implying this happens alot which is doesnt. She also said that they will be discussing that im about to have unauthorised absense , i told my manager that the important factor is i have no choice but to collect my son due to a childcare issue. My colleagues told me they didnt get asked to cover my shift and one said she would cover it, but i think we are beyond that now as the company are clearing trying to get rid of me. I told HR what is happening and they immediately took the managers side as they always do because they are corrupt. I never have to have people cover my shift due to sickness or something school related. I told my manager 3 weeks in.advance and she did nothing. Also, she changed the rota meaning i am alone for the last hour on ny late shifts for the next 3 months. I spoke to legal and they have advised it sounds like im being targeted and singled out and its discrimination. What can i do?