Hello there!

I’ve been married to my husband since almost 2yrs(in august).

Things have been good. I’ve never doubted him and we were talking lately on how I’m okay with him wanting to explore people as long as we are honest about it and everything is transparent.

However from 2-3months I had this gut feeling that something is off. Our sex had reduced as well (1c a month or 2wic at max).

One day last month, I couldn’t sleep at night and woke him up and checked his phone… I found tons of messages of him flirting with multiple people on Instagram and WhatsApp.. discussing on when they want to come over and planning for it in July (as I’m travelling out of town).

He also had described to his friend on message that he recently slept with a girl n she was home when I was out of town last month.

When asked, he agreed to have flirted and said it’s just that. He’s never met any of the girls nor has he gotten anyone home or hooked up or anything of that sorts.

He owned up to his mistakes and said there’s nothing missing in our relationship, he loves me & it’s just that he ended up flirting and never intended to pursue them in real.

And about what he told his friend, it was just a lie he told her to sound cool cuz that friend of his has open relationship and she tells about her adventures and he wanted to sound that he’s cool too.

After this we did a lot of talking for a few days… n I have tried to believe his words and now he has stopped using social media temporarily. He said he doesn’t want to use it for a bit and once he feels he would reinstall them and he also said he will ensure this NEVER happens again.

I am trying however it’s been almost a month and I’m always paranoid and worried. I’m unsure how to stop doubting him. He’s trying to be transparent and has given me access to his phone but I also worry what if he’s cheating n now more smarter in hiding?

Idk what to do. How to trust again.

I have told him clearly. Even 1 single thing I find, it’s divorce. N he’s agreed to that. But I’m worried all the time.

To some level I believe him. But since he’s already cheated on me, my mind is not letting me and I’m going insane.

Please let me know if any of you have faced similar thing and how you’ve worked past it.

Infidelity Recovery