I'm not sure what I'm really coming to post for... maybe I just need to get this out to other women that can relate. Here goes.

I have one 11 year old son. Got pregnant with him 3 years after being diagnosed with PCOS. I wasn't actively trying or anything. I just got serious about my health when I was diagnosed because that was always my biggest fear growing up... not being able to have children. All I've ever wanted was to be a mom. Sure, I had the dreams of a career and stuff but it was mainly my homelife that I dreamed about. So of course it was a huge blessing to have my son.. fast forward. His father passed just before his 3rd birthday. We were no longer together and had both moved on. I've been married to the love of my life for 7 years now. We have been actively trying since 2014. My cycle has been regulated for the last (almost) 3 years. The latest I've been was 4 days. Even my husband has my cycle down. Better than me honestly lol. He recognizes my mood changes before I do. So, when it didn't start this month he was quick to point out that I wasn't showing my usual menstrual signs. The day I was due to start there was a little light pink blood on the toilet paper. My mind immediately went to implantation bleeding but I shut that down real quick and just figured I was spotting. Well, today makes 14 days late. 11 negative tests. Only period symptoms I've had are mild cramping and I just started to break out a couple of days ago. Not the usual sore breasts, mood swings, aching hips. And of course it seems like I'm having all of the pregnancy symptoms but idk if it's legit or just my mind. The smell of a freshly opened bottle of ketchup made me sick the other day. I've been nauseous, extra tired, not moody but more sensitive.. and a few other things but this is already stupid long. If you've made it this far, thank you.

I have an appointment in two days to see what's going on. I'm starting to get real worried. Every day that theres no blood I get a little more excited buy every morning that I see a negative my heard breaks some more. I'm so scared I'm going to find out something I'd wrong and that I won't be able to get pregnant at all.

To top it off.... just last month I was approached by my newly pregnant niece and asked to adopt her unborn baby.... we were all for it, calling lawyers... but they changed their mind. I have no ill feelings toward them, that's a huge decision...but... I just feel...idk. I'm just being tortured now. I just want to know if I can be excited.

Has this happened to anyone else? Any false negatives? For how long?

Any prayers, good juju, love and baby dust are greatly appreciated.

I want nothing more than to carry my husband's child. I want to experience pregnancy with him. With someone that will be at the appointments with me. I want to see his excitement when he hears his child's heartbeat. I want to hold his hand and cry together when we find out the sex. I want this so bad 😭

PCOS Support