Aspecs and arospecs

A group for anyone on the asexual spectrum and/or the aromantic spectrum.

Creator: fae

Members: 170

Struggle/Rant

I am really upset. I am very happy with who i am as an ace person but i still feel broken. i am afraid that the person i like won’t like me back because of that. most of the time i am ok with who i am but some days it hits harder than usual. i really wish i could be like everyone else and want to have sex. i seem like something special but i get uncomfortable when i think about it often. i don’t know if anyone else understand but i just need to rant a bit. i am also on the aro spectrum so sometime i don’t even know if i want a relationship but other days i do. i am lost and feel alone but i know that someday it will be ok

Upvotes 1
Comments 1

Last reply Dec 24, 2023

Ev

Hi! I know you posted this a while ago but I just joined this group and saw it now… I feel the same way. You’re not alone and I promise you’re not broken 🫶 I’ve never really looked for a relationship but anytime I’ve come close to being in one, the other person leaves when they find out I’m ace and I have no desire to have sex with them. It’s hard sometimes because I enjoy single life but I get depressed thinking I’ll die alone because I don’t like sexual relationships 😢 I know we’re strangers but if you ever want to rant, I’m here for you. I recently came out to friends and family and they don’t get it at all. My mom straight up told me “asexual identity doesn’t exist.” :(

Wasted Identity

Sometimes I wish I was straight and not ace (maybe aro???). I feel like what I don’t experience isn’t natural and I should be feeling something or doing something that I’m not. How is it that I can be so acephobic to myself???

Upvotes 0
Comments 2

Last reply Nov 16, 2022

A

The reason is that society and media treat people as though they are incomplete unless they are in a romantic relationship. How many times have you seen all the characters in a book get paired up at the last minute? Then there’s shipping culture? Basically, because we are atypical, we are sometimes treated as defective, which is not the case. Best wishes

Rant time.

Okay bit of a rant here.Im aro and ace and fine with it but sometimes I just want to be “normal.”Like everywhere you read is about people falling in love and experiencing heartbreak and all that jazz. I want to experience that.And I can’t because I just don’t fall in love.I had this great guy who treated me amazing and 100% would have gotten together except for the fact that I had no feelings other than friendship for him. It has been like this forever and again I’m fine with it but occasionally I want to feel in love and even heartbreak and just ugh.

Upvotes 10
Comments 1

Last reply Sep 19, 2019

Ev

I understand that and I have the same problem. For me, I try to understand that my idea for love hasn’t changed, just the labels on it. I still want to same things in a partner, I just didn’t have the way to describe it before. And I also try to live through the TV/movie/book characters I love.

Logging masturbation

I’m aroace and don’t plan on having sex any time soon, but I still want to track my orgasms (and related horniness) in relation to my cycle. How have you been navigating the allo-centricity of the logging options?

Upvotes 0
Comments 4

Last reply Sep 18, 2019

Sh

I am so non-libnistic it's funny. Eve: "You're around peak horniness around this time"Me: "I feel a slight buzz." (Or nothing, heck I don't even remember if I ever have been turned on.)

Ace Masturbation!

I’ve been trawling the masturbation groups and 90% of the discussions focus on allo experiences, so I wanted a place to talk about masturbating while ace. To start off, a question I’ve always had: What do you think about/picture when you masturbate to get yourself going? I picture sex but from a 3rd person POV, like I’m watching through a movie camera; trying to move to 1st person throws me off completely. What about y’all?

Upvotes 2
Comments 7

Last reply Dec 24, 2023

Ev

Nothing! It’s almost meditative for me 😂 I only get there if my mind is blank

Asexual Awareness Week

Happy Asexual Awareness Week! This October 22-28 is a week to recognize asexuality and the asexual community. You can celebrate by coming out, having pride, or educating people people on what asexuality is. You don't have to do any of this if you don't want to and especially if it will endanger you but just take this time to remember that you are not alone in how you feel and there is a whole community of people who love you! :)

Upvotes 5
Comments 0

Last reply Oct 23, 2017

A

I’d have kids, but I wouldn’t have the patience. I’ll settle for being a cool aunt instead

Sh

What if you're aroace?