First Time

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 8 months. We are both virgins and the furthest we have gone is feeling someone up before our relationship. I'm not on birth control yet. About two months ago my mom had a conversation with me saying when him and I are thinking about it talk to her and we would go over options. I'm nervous to talk to her about this. But also if I get on birth control then it makes it all so real. I've heard it hurts and tears but also feels good and is wonderful. Like what's the reality of the first time since we are both inexperienced? And after the first time does it get better?