Feeling so insecure

Feeling kind of bad about myself today. Hubby and I were supposed to go out but I just can't do it. I'm heavier than I've ever been far from obese but def over weight. I go to the gym and have a trainer but have yet to see any changes. Because of this, I either am physically uncomfortable in everything I wear or it looks horrible. If I can't feel good about myself about the way I look, I don't even want try. My husband doesn't know but it's affecting our sex life. I don't want him touching me. We used to have sex 3-4 times a week now it's a couple times a month only during fertile week. God, we had sex during the day a few days ago and I couldn't even enjoy it because I knew he could see me. I usually rush off to bed "tired", " headache " or my "back hurts" to avoid having sex. I just don't even know what to do anymore.