This will probably make you laugh, that's okay. 

To start, I'm going to name off a few things about my moms goat, his name is buck.. But I have a name for him myself. BUTTHOLE. She  brought him home one day at 3 days old and has bottle fed him. 

1. He thinks he is a human and that he should be inside, since he has gotten bigger he is harder to put back outside. He only listens to my mom, so when I get home from work I am squeezing myself through the door so he doesn't come in and POOP ON THE COUCH. 

2. HE POOPS ON THE COUCH! 

3. He stands up on top of his house (yes he has his own house outside because he's a spoiled brat) and HE SCREAMS INTO MY WINDOW.

3. He stands up on top of his house and jumps out of his pin. He is just getting harder and harder to contain. He reminds me of a cartoon. 

4. HE HOGS THE FRONT PORCH SWING. 

Ahhh, the joy of coming home and chilling on the swing while drinking my tea while I just stare and take in all the beauty around me. NOT ANYMORE. He likes to get on the swing, stand up and rock back and forth and then sit down and enjoy it. If I try to sit down with him, he says BAAAA BAAAA AND KNOCKS MY DRINK OUT OF MY HANDS. I RUINED MY WHITE CONVERSE. And he literally tries to eat my hair, he will grab and mouth full of my hair and pull.  

5. He follows me everywhere outside, I like to go outside to visit our other animals. He's jealous of my goat, she's pregnant and I love her to death and she's due any minute. HE ANNOYS HER TOO. She's sassy and when he's around her attitude is like "I can't deal with that thing, make him go away" 

LIKE COME ON. 

6. While he's following me, HE HEADBUTTS MY BUTT! 

He has the weirdest personality for a goat. It is so weird, I have never seen a goat like him in my life and I'm pretty sure it's because he was raised by humans. 

Oh, and 7! HE CRIES ABOUT EVERYTHING! And his cry sounds like a giant mutant human baby.  Seriously, he was screaming like something was killing him last night and I freak out and run outside and HE JUST DIDNT LIKE THE BABY CHICKENS RUNNING AROUND HIS PIN! HE WAS PISSED ABOUT IT! SO HE DECIDED TO SCREAM UNTIL SOMEONE CAME OUT THERE AND PUT THE BABY CHICKENS IN THEIR COOP! 

This is legit like having an annoying pain in the ass younger sibling, except it's a freaking goat that enjoys being inside and swinging on the front porch swing. 

Oh my god.