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I need to vent. 🔫 also TMI & vulgar language

Hillary • Sun, May 29

So. Back story . Also disclaimer. If you don't want to read ALOT. then just back out. Lol

And if you don't like vulgar / cussing / open sexual talk. Back out. Lol I don't want to offend anyone. I just need to vent. And talk to someone about this.

Fiancé is Muslim. We got pregnant on accident with a broken condom. He starts feeling guilty for having sex and now getting me pregnant out of marriage. So he decides to not touch me until we are married. IVE BEEN GETTING DIVORCED FOR A YEAR FROM MY FIRST HUSBAND. So I'm still waiting for divorce certificate. And we have to find a place we come to terms with for a quick marriage before anyone knows I'm pregnant - his family will like disown him or something.

So. Anywayssssss. I haven't been FU**ED in almost two months now. Ok. So my hormones have me humping pillows in my sleep. I'm always horny and dream of sex every time I'm asleep.

I cry even.

I send him nudes a lot. Specially now my boobs are even bigger so I like showing him. 😂

I beg and throw fits. Won't touch me.

So I'm over here filling bloated and ugly and now he's denying me ME the D. So I feel all kinds of fucked up in the head. Like the deed is done honey it isn't changing the fact that you did it. So denying me is just stupid.

So usually in the mornings he wakes up early closes our bedroom door and goes to do his morning things. I usually stay asleep. But I woke up because I needed to pee and the bathroom door was LOCKED. So I'm like um ok...

So he lets me in and his phone is laying on the counter and he's in his boxers with a chub. ... I'm half asleep and I'm like I know he is not in here watching porn. He even told me he thought it was wrong when I first met him.

So I go lay back down and 5 mins later I hear a girl moaning.

I seriously thought I was hearing shit. So I got up and walked to the doorway. And sure the fuck enough I hear a bitch moaning.

So he can sit here. And deny his horny girlfriend everyday. And. AND not have the friken decency to at least look at me while you cum ? That would be MUCH more acceptable to me at this point.

But right now ? The state I'm in ...your watching another girl get fucked. While making yourself cum.

Buddy. I just. I can't even process wtf was going on. Not only did it piss me off it fucking hurt my feelings so bad.

I am a pretty girl. I can be sexy. I take sexy pictures. Hell I could make money from my pictures from guys getting off to them dammit. And here I can't even get laid when I BEGGG. and your fantasy laying the pipe to some porn slut.

Am I over reacting ?

How would you react ? Like I'm just so confused.

He's the one that is refusing me the D. So why should he get to go watch porn and masterbate. ?

If I was the one denying him sex I'd understand.

But you have a perfectly nice V to put your P in all day. Ugh I'm so frustrated. And I'm horny. Always.

I just uggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sex used to be something I was like. Eh. Whatever. I could go without if needed.

But dammmmnnnnn I've never been this horny in my lifffeeee. 🙌🏽🙌🏽😭😭😭

If anyone has read all of this. Please. Tell me your opinions or your reactions of this was you. Or if I'm being silly. Or maybe something I can try to get him to just get over it and give it to me. Lol