I just don't know anymore
I met my fiancé dec 24 2010 I was 18 he was 20..I fell hard and fast for him! We were in an on and off again relationship till September 2011 we didn't have sex for the first time until sept 29 2011.. That November he told me his dad was in the er and left..being worried about his dad I asked his sister..my fiance had lied so I went driving around looking for him cause he wasn't answering his calls or texts I found his car at an old friends house that he used to get high with..I didn't go in I just left and waited for him to return home..when I asked him about it he said he couldn't be in a relationship and we were jut gonna be roommates at our apartment since it was a two bedroom..well the breakup only lasted a week and we were back together. Skip ahead to April 2012 i was in a car accident that happens right in front of him my Pontiac sun fire was struck by a semi..that brought us closer than ever the thought of losing each other was terrifying..but I recovered and we were happy again..August 8th 2012 the day after his 22 birthday I found out I was pregnant..he took it hard and his words haunt me to this day..I told him I was pregnant and he said "figure out what you wanna do..I don't want it not now" I was devasted but it's not like he was trying to prevent it...he says he's allergic to condoms and they kill the mood so never in our entire relationship has he ever worn one..he eventually changed his mind and was excited to be a daddy but we had a rough relationship during my pregnancy..I lost my job and was unemployed in January... April 3rd 2013 our beautiful daughter was born..in the hospital he was the perfect daddy he changed diapers and everything..but when we got home he wanted nothing to do with midnight fedlings or changes or baths..I felt kinda guilty knowing he had work in the morning and I don't so I just tried to do everything..which ultimately led to me co sleeping with our daughter on the living room floor and to this day she is up 3-4 times a night..our daughter is 19months..we have had some terribly awful arguments they are never violent and never in front of our daughter but they get very intense..lately they have gotten worse and I know it's cause we are both stressing but I just don't know what to do anymore he's being promoted at work so we are moving an hour away..where we live now is perfect we have lovely beighbors and our parents are just down the road..I'm soo soo super close to my mom I can't imagine being far away from her..but come Black Friday I'll be moving..I love Wes and I think he loves me but I can't help but think he's cheating on me I found a card from a girl in his car the other day saying how special he makes her feel and how she's gonna work on makin him feel just as special..he blew it off that he got it from a girl he works with that he also went to high school with..I'm having a very hard time believing that..i dont know I guess I'm just looking for advice..
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