I am 18 years old. I've suffered with PTSD, anxiety disorder, depression since I was 7 years old. I started feeling better when I was around 12, made friends... People started liking me finally. All that went down the drain at 14. I thought I was grown and "in love". I reconnected somehow with a boy I met at 8 years old in a hospital holding "mental hospital" for kids who've had breakdowns I guess THERES A BIG RED FLAG BTW. I got pregnant 8months into that relationship... He planned it to keep me . He was 15 years old and an alcoholic . He became abusive. Mentally physically sexually.9 months pregnant he beat me to the point I actually screamed for help from my mother via text. I lived with my grandparents . My uncle contacted my pop and the cops were called. Thought I was saved. I had the baby... And for some reason I begged for his family to get him there. I wanted us as a family. On and off break up makeup until this year. I loved working. I had family to watch my daughter while I worked and it was getting easier. We moved Into our own place this time. He let family live with us and his whole family is drama which I hate so he started with his old ways again. Worse. I paid the bills and he stopped taking me to work. Kicked me out everyday and things got very bad. Long story short I fell out of "love" with the man I was with my whole teenage years . My abuser. He owned me. I made a new friend and he was a close friend to my ex. He seen him for who he was. He saved me in so many ways until we fell Inlove. I was planning on moving out with my grandparents as soon as they found another house. It didn't get to that point. Things hit the fan when I got pregnant again. It could have been my boyfriends but the only time we had sex was when he forced me to , with the other choice of sleeping baked outside with all the city rats under my feet. I almost chose abortion. He found out about us and we packed up some things and left. States away. He promised to take care of us even if it wasn't his baby. Fast forward to a year from moving out of state, away from all friend... Family... Everything. We now how our own place. He works from dusk to dawn while I'm home with my two blessings. I start work at 4pm to 1 pm . I am FINALLY HAPPY!!!! all my life was a search for a teaspoon of happiness. Everything want I have. Anything you want to set your mind to can be accomplished. Please don't doubt yourself. You're not alone in anyway. Thank you for taking the time to read this far. I just woke up this morning , 7 am like usually, feeling a weight off of my shoulder. Thinking how even though some days I beg the baby for a couple more minutes of sleep, I AM STRONG! I am a mom! I am TRYING ! And I will not give up!