A little vent/idk.

So a little back story. I was in a really bad relationship a long time ago, before I even met my husband. My ex used to hold me down and force me to have sex. Push me down, he's punched me, etc. When I finally got the balls to break up with him, he threatened to kill himself. I became really depressed and had sex with a bunch of people just to feel wanted after that and then I met my husband. He made me so happy. Fast forward 7 years and 2 kids later (and another on the way) and I have only gotten off during sex 2 times the entire relationship and never before that. At first I didn't think much of it...but now idk if I have some type of mental block from never getting help. I had gotten into the habit of faking it, even before my husband. I feel like I should maybe look into counseling now.