PPD - feeling alone
Anyone else struggling with a bit of postpartum depression? My doctor is going to put me on medicine in a few days if I'm still not coping well...
Had our baby two weeks ago and while I'm not having any ill thoughts - I'm constantly crying from fear, anxiety, and haven't felt calm or really happy since we were at the hospital.
I dont know why, but I miss being in the hospital. I miss being fully taken care of, I miss having the reassurance hourly that baby and myself are doing great.
We've both had appointments this week and both got a 100% on our health charts - but it's not enough. They tell me we're healthy and I cry. I go home and she sleeps and I cry. I cry when I'm with her because I just want a minute alone to sleep, I cry when I'm alone because I'm convinced something will happen while I'm away.
I cry at the thought of anyone besides me or my husband holding her, I just... Can't get calm and happy. Half of me can't wait until she's a few months old and not in the delicate newborn phase... Then I cry because I'm missing these precious early days stressing for nothing!
I dont know how to explain this to my husband. He's being amazing and taking such good care of me and baby...but then I cry because I feel useless.
I feel awful because everyone I know in person and read about on here seems to be doing great and happy and I feel alone with these anxieties.
I'm just...hoping to find one person who feels like this to know I'm not the only one. Has anyone gone through this without medication? When does it get better? I miss being me 😞
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