Would you be upset?

Question

I had a friend of mine message me today and ask me how far along I was when I lost my baby. I told her almost 11 weeks. Then she says.. "oh so you were still in the first trimester.. so it was just an embryo." That alone upset me but I told her technically by 10 weeks it is considered a fetus. Then she tells me to let her know when I'm ready for tough love because then she'll talk to me...
Wtf?  
This just seems totally inconsiderate...

Answer

I would be very upset. She's ignorant. I lost 2 babies at 5 weeks both times. From the moment I had that positive test I was in love with my little one. All I did was think about them and start planning right away. It's crazy how much you can love and worry about someone you've never even met. I left the ER yesterday from the 2nd miscarriage and it's been so hard. All I've done is cry and wonder what they would've been like. It doesnt matter when you lose your baby. Either way you lost your baby. Feeling sad or however you're feeling is completely valid and anyone who tries to make you feel invalid needs to get a grip.

Answer

I am angry for you. How dare she say that to you. The last thing you need is tough love! You need chocolate and hugs and tissues and someone to listen to you spill your guts about how your feeling.  No longer a friend in my eyes.

Answer

Disrespectful, unkind, rude and the worst kind of words a "friend/human being" could say! Hugs , and I am very sorry for your loss.

Answer

Doesn't matter how far along you were when you lost it.... To you it was your baby that you had dreamed of and all you wanted to be able cuddle and love.  I lost one at 10 weeks, 16 years ago..... My sister and I were just a few days apart and there are still times seeing my niece will bring tears to my eyes.  I'm now 20 weeks with my rainbow baby a little girl.... I still think I'm holding back being excited because I'm afraid that something could still happen to this little girl.  Unless you have been through a loss it's hard to imagine.  I had miscarried before my best friend had so when her hubby called me I went right over, crawled into bed with her and just let her cry.... She ended up having 6 miscarriages before having her 3 little ones.... Every time she would call to tell me she was expecting it would be hard to get excited for her right away but she knew I was always there for her either way.  Your "friend" seems to be trying to justify not being upset or trying not to be sad by saying it was just an embryo.  It could be that she is sad for you and just doesn't know how to convey it.  Let her know that it doesn't matter how far along you were to you it was alive and you loved it dearly.

Answer

It doesn't matter if you lost the baby at 4 weeks, it's still your baby. There is still that possibility of life that steals your heart as soon as you see the positive test. I have always said I would wish a mc on anyone, but I kind of hope she gets the chance to experience it herself.

Answer

Doesn't sound much like a friend

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What a bitch. Excuse my language.

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She sounds like an asshole

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What a Bitch !! omg that is so rude of her

Answer

I see what she's trying to do but she's not good at talking about this kinda thing

Would you be upset?

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