Beyond miserable <useless rant>

Apologies for the negative posts. These last few weeks have been so, so tough on my body and mind. I am constantly hurting all over. My shoulders are as raw as if they have been bruised. My back can barely support my weight anymore. I can't fit in my shoes. The baby is growing bigger and bigger and refusing to shift or engage. His kicks and movements are so, so much stronger that they hurt enough sometimes to make me cry. I can't sit, stand or lie down in a comfortable position. My stupid strech marks hurt like hell cause he keeps stretching them more I guess.

Apart from physical discomfort, my work that I love, is suffering so much. I have given up so many opportunities over the last year due to pregnancy, I hate that it still isn't over. I am not yet on my way to recovery. All through my pregnancy, the doctors thought that he will come by 37/38th week at the rate he was growing. Now I am almost at 40 without any signs of engagment from him. I feel miserable. I don't want to have to push out a 10 pound baby weeks after my due date and I don't want to get induced if he isn't ready. It is my first child so I don't want an elective C Section either, and want to give him the chance to be born naturally. But, God help me if this process isn't making me want to fling myself off the roof.