He doesn't love me 😔

After dating for two years, my boyfriend still doesn't know if he loves me. His parents never said it to him, but I couldn't keep using that as an excuse. We're on a month-long "break" for us to have some space. But I know it means a break up in about a month. I feel really numb. I feel like I'm going to be very depressed in about a week. But right now I just feel numb. I've loved men but no one has ever ever loved me back. Can't help but think it's some defect of mine. I never want to fall in love again.