This is a long one. Read it or not, I just need to get this out. TIA

My daughter is 3 weeks and a couple days. I wasn't planning on trying for another any time soon but thinking of having another child at all just makes me terrified. It's not my labor or delivery experience that has me traumatized, it's my postpartum experience. For 2 weeks I wasn't able to do anything but lay in bed without feeling like I was going to just die. I'm not exagerating when I say the pain I had was 3x worse than my actual labor and delivery. I couldn't be in any other position than laying flat. Even using 2 pillows to elevate my head caused the worse headache ever. What made it worse was that no doctors could diagnose what was going on with me. I have no idea how but out of no where, day by day I was just getting better on my own. I can now actually hold my daughter, feed her, and everything else. No matter how painful it was I would still do it all again for her. My husband and I aren't planning for another one until next year but, next year is just around the corner and I am absolutely terrified of the thought of going through that again. I jokingly told my husband our daughter was our one and only and he just seemed upset because he wants his son but he understood after seeing what i went through. Who knows I may not even experience the same pain again but again, just the thought of it makes me cringe and want to cry. Seriously considering talking to someone about this because I am truly traumatized. I feel if maybe I was atleast informed of the different kinds of pp experiences then I would've expected and be prepared for the pain.