Feeling Alone need advice

So me and my boyfriend of 10 months recently broke up and I've suffered through anxiety and depression all my life but when we broke up it made me even more depressed. I do want him back cause he doesn't know that he's saved me from 2 attempted suicides. I would love to talk to him about getting back together but he doesn't want to listen to me no one does and sometimes I just feel like cutting my phone off and actually killing myself