Trying not to be depressed...??

I've been TTC for 8 months with no luck, kinda feel like giving up. So I decided to try for a Christmas pregnancy announcement. I was ready, brought my pre seed and I knew when I was ovulating (11/27/14). On 11/18/14 my dad passed, I totally lost my train of thought and I was literally lost. My DH and family has been a great support through this tragedy. I didn't want to try for a baby anymore, well at least that month. I was over it...... but after talking to my mom, DH, and pastor I chose to keep going, because that's what my dad would have wanted. So I did, well I was having symptoms left and right, started spotting I just knew I was pregnant! Nope..... my period started 4 days early...... beyond pissed! Then one of my clients passed yesterday. I work with disabled individuals. I'm so sad about this.... it is so unbelievable.

Sorry if this is too long, I really needed to let everyone know about this....... it's so hard right now, I still want a baby but at the same time I feel too down to even try.