Not completely sure what I'm looking for in a buddy. I've realized that I really get sucked into anecdotes, the "in my case I did x and then got y." I tell stories to myself and convince myself that will happen to me exactly even though I know better. I'm a data girl and would like someone similar so I can stay away from tempting anecdotal evidence of what is and is not safe and what I should and should not expect in an average pregnancy. 

   I am a rather weird one. I trust research and statistics more than most. As an example, I never went through the guilt phase after my miscarriage because I know that scientific evidence shows there is no way to prevent a miscarriage and that miscarriage is a normal part of reproduction, mostly as a way to remove unviable embryos with chromosomal abnormalities (for us, it was in chromosome 14). I understood the probability of a miscarriage and the purposely random process of genetic recombination, so I didn't feel guilty about something not just out of my control but necessary for healthy reproduction. It sucks and I hate it, but it's never been my fault.

   That said, I am struggling with the trauma of losing what should have been my first child and frustrated with this stupidly long journey just to get to this part (I'm bipolar so we had to switch to safer meds first. Yay adding a year to the $@&* long process of TTC.). I'd like to chat with someone in a similar position or mindset. I could really use some support right about now. 

   Thanks for reading this far. All the best wishes and hopes to your journey. 

Whitney