I don't like feeling this way..

My son is so cute and adorable and I just want to eat him all up.. but.. I feel like I made the wrong decision in deciding to parent. Every morning or in the middle of the night when I wake up with him I just think of how I don't want to be a mother. I'm so lonely. It's hard. I don't have any friends in the area and hardly any family that'll come over and spend time. I know it'll get better.. I know eventually I'll sleep through the night.. but it's so trying and exhausting right now. I'm only a week in and I feel like a bad mom.