emotional abuse? autistic relationships?

Question

My boyfriend has autism and OCD. He's the cutest guy in the world and so sweet caring and great to me. You couldn't tell from just looking at him that he had autism or OCD. My problem with our relationship is he obsesses and gets so confused and angry and frustrated about what I say or just like random things like that. Sometimes he hears me say something or I'll answer a question he has and he'll have me repeat it for hours or even days and if I don't he gets so frustrated. Like for an example I said "everyone loves you so much baby" and he had me say it with the same emotion in my voice probably 200 times. If I'm ever in a bad mood he gets frustrated. He always thinks he did something wrong. I'm always apologizing for things I didn't do wrong just so he's happy. Is all of this emotional abuse? Or is it just him being autistic. We've been together for almost a year. I'm too invested now. I don't know how i could ever break up with him, he's amazing. I just idk help. Please give me some opinion.

Answer

My guess is he's hard at understanding but may be taking some advantage of his issues. He can't always be innocent and he needs to realize he does do stuff wrong once in a while. But being autistic you gotta remember he was told his whole life in class he was doing everything wrong. So it's a tricky situation. But if you ever need to confront him I would suggest asking his mother how she would confront him in situations. You don't need to give details but it always helps when you ask someone who knows how autism works.

Answer

I think you need to do a lot of research on autism and autistic relationships. It sounds like your boyfriend might has Asbergers? Check it out. It kinda sounds like what you are describing.

I can't tell you one way or another if this is emotional abuse or autism. Unfortunately, sometimes autism can mean hurting others just through the inability to communicate and understand. That doesn't necessarily mean it is emotional abuse tho. I think you should do a lot of research and talk to his parents. They would be able to guide you. And talk to him! Tell him it's making you uncomfortable and try to come to an understanding. This won't be an easy relationship by any means but it will be impossible without communication. Good luck!

Answer

I think it's hard on both anyone with any sort of disability or mental illness and the person who is with them to make a healthy relationship last. I would say just be patient and try to find new ways of understanding. Educate yourself on ways to handle people with OCD and autism. Look up articles, attend seminars, just grab your hands at just about anything to help make it so he's understood and so he knows your there for him. Although it can get pretty one sided, just try to remember that the amount of effort you and him put in should be the same and that the relationship's worth is based on your happiness and his! I'm not sure how helpful this sounds, but it's the main advice I can give since I'm not necessarily well versed in how OCD/autism works with relationships in mind! Good luck 👍

Answer

I think it could be autism, but also part of his OCD. I also have OCD and I obsess over the tiniest things and I need things repeated over and over again, I repeat tasks over and over again (for example, I can't leave the house without locking the door five times), and people always get frustrated with me, but they don't really understand what's going on.

Answer

Since he's autistic it's very likely he doesn't understand empathy. You may need to take the time to calmly say what you're upset or angry about and tell him in a way he'll understand. If you don't know how to do that try and relate it to something that has happened to him before hand. If he treats you well and you love him that stay with him. Try to be level headed when you speak to him that helps. My sister is autistic and like your bf you can't tell that she is.

emotional abuse? autistic relationships?

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