I've never had a friend for more than a year. I really don't know what's wrong with me. When I'm alone I just feel so lonely and depressed, but when someone actually wants to talk to me or shows interest in me I just feel so awkward and don't know how to act then I end up pushing the person away, either by lying to them or avoiding them. Then the cycle begins again. I feel like I'm just gonna end up being friendless forever.
Update: Thanks a lot for your advises. I appreciate it.