My fight, my battle, my war 💪
Now alot of people will just scroll past this post being the title doesn't really grab you! But for those of you who have come to read, I just wanted to tell you a little bit about me! I took this photo today, my 1st full day home from hospital, where I was served food on paper plates, plastic cutlery and everything I used was classed as contaminated - where I had no view from my window, people if they came to visit had to look threw a protected window no bigger than a shoe box, just some of the pleasures I had whilst I had my stay on the unit, all I wanted to do was to go home, hold my son! Squeeze my fiancé and go and pick up my step daughter.
Being in my mid 20's I was always told the world is your oyster, under the impression you can do whatever you want whenever you want, You always wish when you were younger- that you could be older, isn't it crazy how people wish theirs or their children's life away, 'i can't wait to see my child walk/crawl/have their first day at school!' or 'i can't wait to drive, buy a house, have a child'... Looking back 6 months ago, I was that person, wishing so much, so badly to have a child with my fiancé that I was blind to most of the great things around me, like how big my boy is, and how my stepdaughter has grown so much since I first met her, how good our house is, even when it's messy!! How my parents looks not just a passing glance, actually looking at how they look, can't remember the last time I looked at them properly, taking my time to remember these precious things in life, now to most people this probably sounds ridiculous! But at my age, where i was at the peak stage in our <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">fertility treatment</a> to start tablets and injections to have that baby we wanted and have tried for over 2 year to concieve unassisted, where our jobs were stable we were happy, newly engaged, 3 words made my world fall apart, I'm really sorry, there is no other way to tell you this "you have cancer"
My whole outlook has changed in life now, I regret every single day I took something for granted, every day. I didn't choose to have this, it chose me, that's fine I'm dealing with it slowly. My life has changed for the better I see it so much clearer now than ever. There are more important things in life to worry about/or not to! Im living life now, my tunnel vision has gone. I will beat you cancer!
The wedding may come- some day 💒
The new baby may come - one day 👶
Nothing else matters to me right now than kissing my children goodnight and making sure I'm there for them tomorrow.
The greater the storm, the brighter the rainbow 🌈
Thanks for reading x