long post! need advice, grandparent relationship!

When I was 13, I had to go live with him and his wife and daughter for 1 year - (my mom struggled with drugs and she went to jail. She got clean and is in a much better place now!)

It was the worst year of my life! His wife HATED me, she was cruel and treated me so poorly. She used food to punish me- she'd make shellfish- which I'm allergic too- anytime I did something bad or good- and I'd vomit for two days straight. I wasn't allowed to leave the table or eat anything else until it was finished. If it was time for bed she would put it in Tupperware and make me eat it for breakfast/lunch/ dinner until it was gone. She was awful. 

Despite that- I loved my dad! He worked out of town though so he wasn't always home. But when he was, I loved to spend time with him and have a father figure. A year after I moved in, his wife got drunk and was super cruel to me. My little brother had died just before I moved there- and she yelled at me and said that he was better off not being around me- all kinds of mean things. I was so emotional and distraught that I left the house and "ran away" back to my moms. My mom was still in rehab so I lived with my 18 year old brother. When I talked to my dad about it- he said that until I apologized to her and repaired my relationship with her, I wasn't allowed in his life. We didn't speak until I was almost 17. 

I went through a rough rebellious stage and at 16 I decided I wanted to go back to school and change my life. I got pregnant at 15, miscarried and was in a very low spot. I called my dad and asked if I could come live there. He said yes as long as I talked to his wife. I did. He still worked out of town so I basically just lived with her. 

It was rough but I finished school and graduated just days before my 18th birthday. His wife and I got into a huge fight- I was dating a guy who was 21- super nice, respectful and honestly a great man. She said he was too old and said I wasn't allowed to see him. She took away my phone and car, wouldn't let me leave- all kinds of things. On my 18th birthday I told her I was going to move out. She threw all of my stuff into the pool and called the cops- said I wasn't welcome anymore. When I got ahold of my dad- he said that I needed to repair my relationship with her. I said no. He said that I could call him when I'm ready to grow up.

We haven't talked since. I'm almost 22 now- haven't heard a peep from him. 

It is important to know that he was my best friend. We had a great relationship and he made promises to me that he'd never leave my life again. He was my biggest fan while I finished school and he was so awesome to have as a dad when he was in town. It was when he was gone that my relationship with his wife caused problems. 

I'm currently 35 weeks and I have such angst about having a daughter and not having her know him. He has asked about me to his mom and my sister- and has offered to them to tell me that if I need anything I can call. 

I had decided early on in the pregnancy that I didn't want him involved in her life because of what happened with us. Well unbeknownst to me- him and his wife got a divorce about 5 months ago now. It made me want to call him and start a relationship again because she was the real problem. But I'm terrified that he will be in and out of my daughters life like he was mine- and that caused so much heartbreak for me- I don't want that for her. 

It's been weighing heavy on my mind lately so I'm a little torn. Should I welcome him into her life... do I keep him out? I'm very lost. My husband thinks that I should call him- he says that as he becomes a dad he would hope his daughter would give him another chance. 

Sorry for the long post! I don't have anyone to really talk to about this.