Just want to vent. ..

My husband is out of town and I have no one to vent to. Been trying to get pregnant for and 4 years, not really doing anything on purpose just not using bc of any sort. Last month we decided to really give it a try, finally my husband is in the same page as me. We tried and I got af in october. I've wanted to make my parents grandparents since before I got married and always dreamed of giving them the news on Christmas my mom and I favorite holiday. This was he last chance we had to get pregnant and know before the holidays this season. We decided to try pre seed this go around, just for shits and giggles. Well then we realized my husband was going out of town right smack in the middle of my fertile window. My heart was crushed. We decided to go ahead and try a day before he left and we'll try again when he got back, which we did. At the time I also realized I hadn't had a yearly check up in the years so I set up an appointment. Next available was a week before af due so I figured, prefect timing. Last week I started having weird cramping, bloating, and sore breasts. That's odd since I rarely have pms and when I due is 4-5 days prior to af, this is 2 weeks prior practicly. I was reading early pregnancy symptoms and ive practicly checked me all off one by one, as much as you can have so soon. Now I feel like it's all in my head, and starting to really get down. I had my yearly today mentioned what I've been feeling and was dismissed as pms.maybe it is all in my head. Just struggling now and can't get out of my own head. I'm a Christian and pray dailyfor God's will and for the peace to accept whatever that is, but just having a hard time right now and not sure what to think.