Missed miscarriage finally diagnosed... (long, sorry!)

Two weeks ago I went for a scan which was deemed inconclusive as there was a gestational sac but nothing else. I was told I had to wait two weeks before I could come back for another scan. My scan was this morning at 10am. I had already kind of prepared myself for the worst but hoped for the best, maybe my dates were wrong?! I think deep down I knew though. With my first pregnancy I hadn't known I was pregnant until after I was due, about five days I tested and only tested then because my friend told me to. Then 18 months later o was floored by this feeling of certainty about three says before I was even due on. I just knew I was pregnant. I don't even know how to describe it. I just knew. Well this time around the only reason I tested is because I had been a bit irregular and I had a spare test. I was shocked. I cried and honestly couldn't believe it. After 18 months I was pregnant! We got excited and happy and just so brilliant and then I had once instance of brown spotting. That was it. Mentioned it to the midwife on the booking appointment and was sent for a scan the next say. That was my two weeks ago. This morning as soon as she started to scan I knew it wasn't the good news I had been hoping for. She turned the screen and there was the empty sac again, same as before. She even checked transvaginally to confirm. I could not have asked for a better midwife to do the scan. She was amazing. She held me as I cried, she cuddled me and she held my hand and let me make my own decisions. I go in next week for an MVA removal. It's a scary decision but I couldn't go through a natural considering I ended up hospitalised last time. It's just too much for me. Turns out she was the same midwife that scanned me for my previous miscarriage and she was amazing then too. I cannot give her enough thanks for the way she has handled things. I'm just praying I have enough strength to get through this a second time... I'm sorry for the long post. I just needed to get it off my chest. Sorry to all those that have lost xXx