we had a miscarriage on July 22, our baby boy was just 18 weeks. the word devastation doesn't even come close to how we felt. but our little guy is in heaven! I still don't know why we lost him. I never felt such pain. my doctor wanted us to wait a full year before getting pregnant again. omg just the thought of waiting the six weeks was horrible. I wanted to be pregnant. well once we were cleared we tried every month. which is very hard for us since I am a flight attendant. being home on ovulation days can be tricky. months 1-5 the let down was grand! but now that I look back I am greatful. I had 5 months to strengthen my uterus. the holidays were hard this year. we were supposed to be holding a new baby boy. instead I worked and worked all month to ease the pain. it didn't help. but the few days I was home was well worth it. I think I knew the day we got pregnant. I swear I felt it! of course ttww was so nerve wrecking! I just kept quiet. superstitions kicking in. day of period...nothing...day two...nothing...ok I want to scream but have to be quiet (didn't even say anything to my husband)...day three...nothing although I'm starting to feel systems...oh and BTW on a mini vacation with husband and parents...so have to act "normal". just so happens to stop in a drug store on the ride home. ok so I pick up a pregnancy test...10hrs away from home. will wait til the morning and will not say a word. finally get home about 10pm. never in my life have i been so excited to go to bed to let my body rest...woke up at 4:48am (to pee) decided to take my test! Omg the lines took so long, but I got them! two pink lines. had to wake my husband to show him! through sleepy eyes he saw the lines and smiled. got back in bed and he held me close. best nap ever! husband leaving for work said have a good day "mama" and kissed me on my forehead!! I am the happiest girl in the world.