Re use wedding ring?

Question

I was married for less than a year to a very abusive guy. Before we got married I went to Kay Jewelers and bought myself a ring. I never told my ex I was looking at rings and I bought it with my own money. He never paid a penny on it. I didn't want to marry him, even be with him, but felt stuck so I went through with the wedding. When we divorced I of course kept my ring. I still wore it for a while after getting divorced bc I loved it and to me it had absolutely nothing to do with him. I eventually sold the ring to my Grandmother. Now I have been with my SO for 5 years and have asked him to buy it back from her. For the past year he said that was fine so I thought I was getting it back. Now I found out he is ring shopping and he showed me one he had picked out at a pawn shop (which is fine) but I HATE it. It looks like the ring my ex had originally bought for me just on a larger scale. It reminds me of my ex and I can't help but cry when looking at it. I told my SO this so he said he would keep looking. Problem is I just want my ring back! I paid $3500 for it, it's my dream ring, and he could buy it from my Grandmother for $500! Is it silly of me to insist on my ring instead of letting him buy a new one he likes?

Answer

I think it may hurt him to see a ring that you wore when married to another man. I would personally get a new ring because you're starting new

Answer

Given you're story, I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to have your old ring. It's sounds like it kind of feels empowering to you because you bought it for yourself. However, I voted to get a new one. Your new man probably doesn't want to see a ring you wore while married to another man on your hand. Even if you bought it for yourself, to the rest of the would it symbolized that marriage. 
Be honest with him, or you'll receive a ring you don't like. Honestly, in the grand scheme of things a ring you're not happy with is no issue when you're married to that one you love, but I get it. 
My husband let me pick my ring and he bought one that looked extremely similar, in his price range. Maybe ask your man if the two of you can go shopping together for it?

Answer

I mean, would you want him wearing a,ring that was associated  with a previous marriage?  Probably not. You two should go shopping together and maybe you can show him some other designs that you like.

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I would not be down with my husband wearing a ring he wore with another woman. I also think used items carry energies of their previous owners so I probably wouldn't be down for a pawn shop ring either.

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I don't understand how the ring your SO picked out can bother you, but not the one your wore while married to your ex? If I was your SO I wouldn't want you wearing the ring you had in a previous marriage, regardless of who bought it. And maybe you and your SO go look at rings together so he can get a better idea of what you like.

Answer

I just voted to get a new ring. But then I realised that's what I'd do, and you're not me, so you do whatever makes you happy and to hell with the rest of us! 😉 might be worth talking it out with your fiancée though.

Answer

It sounds like you really don't know what you want, honestly. On one hand you say you want your ring back, and the other you say you hate it and that it reminds you of your ex. If my fiancé wanted to use a band from a previous marriage(he hasn't been married but hypothetically) I wouldn't be alright with that. That was a symbol of your committment to husband A, and not husband B. Think about it if the shoe was on the other foot. I really don't see how this could be a discussion.. I'm sure it would hurt him to see a ring that isn't his on your hand for the rest of y'all's lives. Perhaps talk with him, and it honestly sounds like you're not100% over your ex. Given the history there, I would possibly seek out someone to talk to, and see if that didn't give you some closure and help you through the conflict you're feeling.

Answer

I think he wants to buy you anew ring to symbolize HIS love for you. And I get hating the one ring because it reminds you of an ex. But other than that I don't think the way it looks should matter so much, it's the love that it symbolizes that matters.

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Look at it from his point of view. Yes you bought it, you loved it. Despite you not even wanting to be with your ex and it having no emotional attachment to him, it still kind of does though. That ring is a reminder of your past marriage and still linked to those bad memories. That was a ring you wore while you were with another guy. He wants to pick out something for you. Something special for you. So yall can start with some new memories and not a reminder of your past.

Answer

Would having your old ring re-set be an option?

Re use wedding ring?

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