How did I get here?

Question

I just found out today that my husband is leaving me. We have been married 5 months and together 5 years. He says he just can't do it anymore, and has realized this is not the life for him - he said he feels like he is living a lie and does not want to be married or have a family.
​ I just found out I was pregnant 3 days ago. (He knows this - it was both of our choice to have kids) I have no idea what to do, how to face this heartbreak and anger and embarrassment. I thought that I was starting a family with a man who would spend his life with me, not choosing to be a single mom - that would not have been my choice. I have no idea how to cope on my own let alone tell my family, friends and coworkers. I know I'm young, but I feel like I have wasted 5 years of my life on a relationship that was a lie. How do I move forward? How do I have this baby? I don't want to be tied to this man who couldn't/wouldn't stay with me for the rest of my life...
​I'm not asking for sympathy and I know not everyone will understand but I just had to put it out there because I can barely function right now. I feel like my life is over - because really the life I knew and the life that I worked to hard to build for myself is over... 
​It's 2am and I've been up for hours just dreading making choices, moving forward and figuring this out. I want to hide from the world.

Answer

Gosh I'm so sorry this is happening to you! Try to just take it one day at a time. Sending lots of love!

Answer

Hey love.

I can't even begin to imagine the pain your going through. My sister in law went through this almost exact same thing.

Honey, he's scared shitless. It's natural, the being scared part. Not the running part, that's pretty cowardly on his part. But being scared, a baby is huge.

One of two things are going to happen. First is your going to be so strong for you and your baby. You're going to let your husband go. Holding on at this moment will push him farther away. He is going to hopefully take a step back and wrap his head around the fact he's just walked out on his wife and come back. Or he will won't. Nothing you do will change it.

You've got to be strong for you. Put your self first. In everything. It sucks. 
I'm so sorry you're going through this while it's suppose to be such a happy time. You'll get through it. It's dark now but the sun always rises.

I'm here if you need someone to talk to. Sometimes strangers are the best of friends.

Answer

I am a firm believer in things happen for a reason. My best advice is to find someone to confide in and who will listen. This may be the time to find out what you are made of. And like most women it's probably determination and grit. I believe you are strong enough to get through the this challenge and come out the other side a better, stronger and more confident women. Good luck honey.

Answer

Alex, this is so heart breaking to read. Even though you don't know this group of women personally just know you have a support system here. Venting or letting your anger out here is A ok!

Answer

So sorry to here that it heartbreaking.... Howeve to agree it sounds like he's scared. He may of felt okay about it when it was just and idea but now that it's a reality it may be scaring him and forcing him to panic.... Take it one day at a time... Hopefully wen his head clears and he's thinking rationally again he will realize how much he needs you! Hang in There!!!!

Answer

Well first off, thanks for letting this be the place to vent. I'm glad you feel comfortable enough to share this with us. 
Secondly, I hope everyone is right and that he's just freaking the F out. If it's any consolation, I was 20, about to turn 21 when I got pregnant with my son. The biological father was never and has never been involved. It's scary as hell but if you were trying for this baby then you should figure out what's best for you. I believe things will work out for you and the little one. I know this will be difficult but TRY not to stress. I wish you the best. Keep us updated ok? Stay strong, tell your best girl friend(s) and at your own pace let family know. Maybe within that time he'll change his mind? And if not, you'll still walk away stronger than you were before. 
😘❤️

How did I get here?

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