emotional and over it
So I'm huge. I quit work and I don't go out anymore so I just lay around because I'm hurting so much. So I don't really fix up anymore. It takes so much effort like it's ridiculous how worn out I get from trying to out on makeup. So I feel really self conscious and just down about myself. I don't see my husband. He owns two mall kiosks so he works over 72 hours a week.
I've told him I can work for him on weekends. So he doesn't have to pay someone else. He can pay me and I'll get out of the house and also have that money coming in to our home. Two/ three days would be good for me to get out of the house walk around. Not be on the couch. Etc. I worked one day for about 10 hours and I was like I've hit my limit I got to go home. But I didn't complain. He made me go home pretty much cuz I was getting sleepy.
Anyways so he never told me to come work again. And then I find out he has hired some pretty little 18 year old girl. Never even mentioned it to me. And come toe find out she's already been on his Facebook and she comes to the mall and says hi to him often and that's how he came to hire her !
Like excuse me? I was banned from having anyone on my fb from the mall. I used to work there at a lot of places* I'm also not aloud to fucking talk to any guys up there period.
And yet he's went and had some girl on his fb and sees her and now hired her instead of me.
And he thinks I'm being childish. But I'm really sad and upset about it idc if it's silly. There's no reason I couldn't have worked ? I'm sitting In a chair selling things from a cart like it's not a biggie. Plus not having a job I don't have my own money to go spend. And I'm a shopper. I need my sprees every now and then and all of my money from work went to every single thing the baby needed. Litterally. Crib swing bouncer platoon clothes you name it. I bought it. So I havnt bought anything for me. Inneed things for after birth. Not to mention just something to make myself feel good yah no.
Sigh. I'm sitting here looking at this girls Facebook about to cry. And I feel so angry. I have a childish side that wants to just leave and let him come home to me being gone. Obviously I'm not going to leave him but I feel this need to make it very known how upset I am. And talking to him doesn't do anything because he just says I'm being silly. And I don't care if I am ! I'm hurt. Mynfeelings need to be known and not brushed off. Pic of girl.
Has me really fucking self conscious and sick and just all over I'm not happy. 😫😩😑
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