mental health..

so lately i've noticed that i have been having horrible thoughts.. like thoughts of wanting to kill myself or hurt myself. I'm not insane or scary i swear,, i've always had issues with self love but recently it's been scaring me with how much i've been considering ending my life. It's to the point where every second i'm having to be around someone or facetime someone so i can make sure i don't do anything to myself. Life has been really hard for me lately. Bad shit keeps on happening to me and i'm losing a lot of people and i feel so alone and scared. I'm afraid of asking for help because i'm afraid that people will call be a psychopath and that people will think i'm being an attention whore. I see a therapist and i have been seeing her for 1 year and a half but im still having these thoughts. I really want help and i want to get better but what scares me the most, is what people will think. What do i do?