Id be the religious person ever

I'm going to start preying. I have preyed a few times but I haven't been blessed with a bfp yet. It's getting harder each month and I'm now on month 11. I'm feeling really confident about this cycle as it's the first time I'm using opk's and bbt, as well as continuous cm checks and cervical position. But, however, I don't want to feel so sure and so confident because I'm so scared about seeing that bfn and I feel like the more confident I am about this cycle, the more disappointed I would feel if I get that bfn. But I'm going to start preying. I'm not religious but I honestly would be so religious and grateful if I got my bfp. I couldn't physically explain my happiness. I would cry and have to hold myself back from telling everyone. I just prey that this is my month. I prey that I get what I've always wanted and I promise to be the best parent I could physically be. Every woman deserves a child especially us woman who are fighting to bring a life into this world. And one day when I finally have my baby boy or baby girl I will tell them how hard I fraught to bring then into this world and that I never gave up for one moment.