manipulative boyfriend ??

Question

I see him as the sweetest person in the world and he makes me unbelievably happy, but my friends and my therapist keep warning me. Here is what I have been noticing in his behavior. (I won't sugarcoat)
-he constantly puts my band down and says that I won't go anywhere if I stay with them
-gets upset when I hang out with the guitarist (even though it's to work on songs)
-accuses me of having feelings for the guitarist
-blows up my phone when I'm out with girlfriends
-asks what I talk about in my therapy sessions 
-rubs his success in my face 
-passive aggressively posts about me on social media when he is upset 
-attempts to kill him self when he's not getting his way 
-when I call him out on his behavior, he says he's breaking up with me and then hangs up the phone

What should I do?! Please don't say break up with him. And I just want an un biased opinion. Thank you💘

Accepted Answer

You said don't say break up with him but what's the alternative? Being stuck in an abusive relationship? Hating yourself? Getting pregnant and exposing your child to an abusive man as a father? It's hard. You have to think about the long-term. It's more serious than you are taking it.

Answer

As someone who saw all these signs in the first couple months of dating my abusive ex... I cannot be unbiased. But I will just share that i thought my ex was the sweetest. Even though he did those things I thought it just meant he loved me. What I found out over the year though was that these things just give out to worse behaviors. 
No boy or man is a standup worthwhile guy if he can't respect your time being yours, and talk through things without pulling out the "I'll kill myself" card or cutting themselves. Trust me, it just gets worse.

Also, your therapist is a professional. Trust their opinion. They simply want the best for you and your health!

Answer

..how old are you, sweetie?

Answer

This is classic abusive behavior. Please keep up with your friends, don't quit your band ever, keep all your hobbies, and don't let his paranoia, his temper, or his social media posts EVER control what you do with your time. Please check out LoveIsRespect.org for helpful quizzes, guides and resources ❤️

Answer

He is manipulative and it may only get worse. Can you try couples counseling? If not, breaking up is the only option unless you're willing to continue to be manipulated and treated that way.

Answer

Leave while you still have some sense of self left.  It won't get any better.

Answer

If it gets worse break up with him and let it be done with before he starts to hurt u

Answer

I can't find that type of behaviour to be very healthy. You're letting yourself get emotionally abused when you could easily be with someone who makes you feel like you're on cloud nine. You don't want us to say break up with him, what is the better option if therapy isn't working either? I don't want to sugarcoat things either, but breaking up is the best solution if things don't improve on his end of the relationship.

Answer

You need to get out before it's too late, girl. So many women lose their lives due to domestic violence. THIS is how it starts. THESE are the warning signs. Your therapist is there to help you and if he/she thinks you need to move on for you safety, DO IT. You can do so much better and you DESERVE so much better! The right man will come along and treat you like gold. I know it seems hard right now but the first step in the right direction is always the hardest. You need to do this for you and your future. Best of luck, girl. 💗👏🏻

Answer

You're too young to be getting fucked up in the head by some guy honestly :(( break ups are hard for most but would be even harder if the relationship is manipulative and dangerous like yours, but think about your future. He is very unlikely to change his behaviour without professional help so you can either help him get that or move on with your life. You're 15, you've got a good 60 years left, do you really want this for all that time?

manipulative boyfriend ??

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