Friend lost a baby - we were due 2 weeks apart. What to do?

Question

A sweet friend of mine lost her little boy last week about a month from his due date. My little girl's due date is only about 2 weeks from what hers was. We used to work together, but we now live a few hours apart. I want so badly to reach out to her, but I don't know if this is the right time given the situation. Mommas, if it were you, would you want to hear from a still pregnant friend when you're going through such a devastating loss?

Answer

This happened to me not too long ago. My friend was a couple weeks behind me and she lost her baby as well. I felt horrible and honestly didn't know what to say either especially since we were just talking about our baby's a couple days before. I ended up messaging her saying how sorry I was for her lost and that her and her husband were in my thoughts and prayers and that if she needed anything I'd be there for her. She ended up saying thank you and that she can't wait to watch my journey with my little boy. So just let her know you're there for her.

Answer

My situations a bit different but my husband and I are friends with a couple who lost their baby nearly a year ago when they were seven months pregnant. We went to visit them in the hospital a couple of days later. I was worried it would be awkward, but it wasn't. I think it made them feel better to have loved ones around listening to what they were willing to talk about.  They talked about her c section, how the baby looked, the name they chose. Everyone will process a loss like that in a different way, but I definitely think you should reach out to your friend, tell her that you love her and are there for anything she needs. And then go from there.
My husband and I are having our baby just about a year after our friends lost theirs, I was so worried it would be a painful experience for them but they've been so supportive to us. So while your friend is grieving and it may be awkward, I think you should still make an effort to reach out. It may make your relationship stronger.

Answer

My best friend lost her baby at 5 months and Our due dates were only a couple weeks apart. It was really hard but as soon as I heard I text her to give my condolences and to see if she needed anything. Things were rocky for awhile she struggled with depression and I wouldn't hear from her for weeks at a time. But I kept reaching out to her and kept letting her know how much I loved her. When she was ready to talk I listened. Our relationship is so much better now and I am glad that I kept reaching out to her. It's hard to lose a child but it's even harder to go through it alone.

Answer

I lost a baby at 8 weeks becuase of an ectopic I worked with a lady who was 5 days ahead, when I came back to work she almost shunned me, wouldn't really engage in conversation and basically shut me out, I understand she was feeling awkward and uncomfortable but I honestly took comfort in knowing her pregnancy was going smoothly and healthily, it was painful but that was my pain to bear but it made thinks so much worse when she was walking on egg shells around me. I think you should reach out let her know you're thinking of her and then leave it to her to respond. I know I found a lot of comfort in my friends pregnancies to know it can go smoothly it's helped me a lot this time around! X

Answer

When I lost my baby I still had a lot of friends that were expecting. I still appreciated it when they messaged me or something like that. Talking on the phone may be hard since she's so emotional. But I'm sure she would appreciate you reaching out to her. I was still happy for my pregnant friends and congratulated them all when they delivered.

Answer

I've never been there so I don't know, but I suggest just letting her decide. I'd reach out just to remind her you are there for her if/when she needs you. Then if you don't hear back maybe give space.

Answer

Honestly I don't know that's a REALLY hard one to deal with.

Friend lost a baby - we were due 2 weeks apart. What to do?

Let's Glow!

The Top Baby Tracker App: Embrace New Beginnings with Tender Care

The Top Fertility Tracker App: Your Path to Achieving Pregnancy

The Top Pregnancy App: Nurturing Your Journey to Motherhood

The Top Period Tracker for Empowering Your Menstrual Health Journey