Frozen Feet

     Okay, this is somewhat of a long and/or confusing contemplation, but if you'd read the whole thing through and give your advice, I'd appreciate it more than I can say.
​     I've been with my man for four years this coming August, and all throughout those years, we've dreamed - and I'm not loosely using that term - about the day we were to finally get married. Now we've finally set a date and things have been starting to come together, but there are quite a few big problems in our way.
​     #1: His parents love me, but still see him as their baby boy and try to control him, even though he's a grown man. I've also overheard them try to talk my brother in law out of considering a marriage with his significant other - also my close friend - and if they would do that to her, of course they would do that to me. Have they already tried?
​     #2: He won't come to me first. When he's making a huge decision that will impact both of us, he will make a decision based off of talking about it with his parents and not me. He even gets confused sometimes, thinking he already talked to me about something and thinking that I'm on board when, in truth, he never even mentioned it before.
​     #3: Money, money, and more $$$. We barely have enough money to have a wedding at all, AND find a place together, AND pay our bills. It's possible, but barely. Plus, we both have a lot going on in our lives and have enough stress on us as it is without dealing with the problems that come with planning a wedding.
​     I personally just want to elope ASAP and move back to my hometown - he loved my hometown when he visited it with me, too - and have a wedding when we are stable and can afford the one we want. But he ride any listen to me when I voice any of my concerns or opinions and writes it off as I'm PMSing or having an anxiety attack, or something stupid. I'm starting to not want to go through with this at all, not even an elopement. I feel pressured by his family, which he keeps too close (my family's never been close, so I'm not comfortable with it and never have been), and I just don't know anymore. Any suggestions? Please keep it nice.