OMG FEELING SO DEPRESSED 😭

so after two MC , I've been trying so hard to give my boyfriend & I a baby ! I want one so bad I went from over obsessive on glow to getting on glow when I'm bored , not even trying as hard & all the time I hear my boyfriend say " babe when you gonna give me a little mila " ( mila is my god daughter ) so it makes me feel worse when he say that kno omg how hard I try , but I don't say anything but I'm trying now babe .. TODAY my period was suppose to come on and i haven't seen it yet .. so I took a cheap test I thought I seen a line but my bestfriend and boyfriend didn't , so I went back to look at it & it was a FAINT LINE so I run to the store get a clear blue and what it say NOT PREGNANT , I told my bestfriend I can cry &I instead of hearing my boyfriend say it's okay babe maybe next time I get omg I hate when she takes these test all they gonna say is negative and you know your period gonna start , are you gonna go and get the 9 dollars back all I can do was go upstairs and cry , he came up here and said sorry but I'm honestly done . I can't try anymore .