If you took on someone else's children would you expect your family to instantly act like they were their own flesh and blood and make a big deal over them and want to refer to them as family ?

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My step son's biological mother is addicted to heroin and has decided to give up on him since last January. I am the only woman figure in his life and he's been calling me mommy for a year now. My boyfriend has full custody of him and won't let her harm him anymore. And since I have taken on this responsibility, I have accepted him as my own and so has my family. And my daughter has accepted him as her brother.

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When my dad remarried I fell in love with her and her family immediately because they all acted like we'd always been there- now they're mine, always will be. My step moms kids became an instant part of our huge extended family too. My husband and I plan to adopt and I know my family will love them as if they have always been there... As an example (and just in case you felt like crying today)  my (step) brother wrote my grandpa a letter after my nanny died in November, he had known her since he was 11 (now 24) but it wasn't his "real" grandma, in the letter he said he just needed to write and say thank you to her and to him for treating him as their own from the first day they met and how much love and respect he had for them for what their love taught him...

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I'm sure it will take a while to create that family bond. I would expect them to be excited and helpful with the new members of the family, but it can take a while for the family bond to develop.

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It might depend on the situation. I personally would want acceptance for the child but there could be a lot of variables too

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I have had my step son since he was 2, I was 18 when his dad and I got together. My siblings weren't completely open to be dating someone with a kid at that age. We have now been together 6 years and everyone in my family treats him as if I had birthed him. It wasn't the babies fault that things didn't work out with his dad and mom, nor is it his fault that his birth mother isn't around. He lost one parent and gained an immediate family of 30+.

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I have two wonderful step children and and adopted daughter. From day one I saw them as my own. I was taken in by my mothers (my aunt) sister at age 11 and her husband (my uncle) and his ENTIRE family took me in and treated me like I was blood. I never once felt out of place. That being said when I adopted my daughter and married my husband I expected my family to accept them just as I was. My mother refuses to acknowledge my children. Which has caused my family to make the decision to exclude her from our lives. She will never know her biological grandchildren because she couldn't accept my step children. In my opinion its her loss. I have amazing children and they know they are loved by not only me and my husband but also by my grandmother, my aunt, uncle and his family. If your family is not willing to accept your step or adopted children its their loss as long as you accept and love them that's what matters.

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Yes. As an adopted child I think flesh and blood families mean absolutely zero. My flesh and blood mother told me she should have aborted me because I wouldnt talk to her. She didn't care what happened to me when she went to jail when I was 10 months, or 5 years, or 9 years, or 14 years old. My real family, the family that chose me and that I chose, they are the ones who opened their hearts and home to me. Some people in their family don't accept me, and those people don't get or deserve my respect or care as well.

Look at all the children who have been raped by their own flesh and blood. Don't you think they would rather have an adopted family who loved them like they deserved to be loved? All children deserve to feel wanted and loved unconditionally, not just ones that are blood related to you. I'm so sick of people making this big ass deal of "He's my ONLY blood cousin! I have to spend time with him!" No you don't! If he treats you like shit and doesn't call you or care to hang out with you then he's not choosing to include you in his family, blood relations or not.

Sorry, I went on a tangenty rant. Yes, I would expect and know my family would love and care for any child I adopted, took in, etc, as much as a child I had given birth to.

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Absoultely.

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Yes I would

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It depends on the premise of the other children being in the picture, foster children for example, if the parents aren't in jail or drug addicts then no. There is no right for the foster parents to just assume the place of the bio parents. However, even in foster situations children need to know they're important and it's good to treat them as such

If you took on someone else's children would you expect your family to instantly act like they were their own flesh and blood and make a big deal over them and want to refer to them as family ?

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