I know this is controversial and I hesitate to even post about it but when I was trying to make my decision whether or not to sleep train, I liked reading other people's experiences.. So here's mine.

Our daughter was a horrible sleeper. I mean, terrible. She needed us to hold her and bounce her and rock her for sometimes over an hour before she would fall asleep. It was a good night if she fell asleep while nursing and I could set her down without waking up. (But she usually did, and we'd have to go through the bounce routine). And even when we could lay her down without her little eyes popping open, she would usually wake up 3 to 4 times in the first hour or two before settling down for any length of time (usually at MOST 6 hours, but more likely 3 to 4). We'd have to go in and rock and bounce her to sleep again.

Each time she woke up in the middle of the night, after I fed her (when she was still young and needed it, towards the end of all this I didn't feed her every time she woke up), it would take her another hour and a half to 2 hours to fall back to sleep.

This was our life from about 2 months to 5 months. My husband and I were at our wits end. He's a high school teacher and gets up at 5:30 am. Sometimes he would only get 4 hours of broken up sleep before having to leave the house and go to work. We would argue in the middle of the night, say things we didn't mean at all! It was horrible for us and I truly think it was hurting our marriage. (I can be a real turd at 3am... 😬).

Basically, I'm telling you all of this to set up the stage for why we made the decision to do Cry It Out sleep training. We knew our daughter was tired. We knew she needed to sleep. And we knew she wasnt getting enough. Some days, she would only get 10 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period due to all of her night wakings. It was getting dire. This wasn't just about us wanting to sleep anymore, it was about her not getting the rest she needed.

We had tried the Ferber method when she was 4 months old and it failed miserably. She just wasn't ready and we felt horrible for putting her through it. We only did it for about an hour and then gave up. We know her and knew it wasn't working. I think that's a mistake a lot of parents make... They try this when the child is too young. It's traumatizing and they never do it again because they assume if it didn't work then, it will never work. That's not the case. At least it wasn't for us.

The day after she turned 5 months, we were over 2 hours into trying to get her to sleep. My husband and I were ready to rip our hair out. Every time we set her down, she would either wake up immediately, or wake up within 10 minutes. It was infuriating. And I hate to say this, but if you've been through this you'll probably understand, I was getting mad at my baby! Why wouldn't she just SLEEP!? I realized we were at a point where if we didn't do something... I would become a bitter parent. I even found myself saying "why did we ever have a kid?" I was that far gone.

So at 9pm on a Saturday, we set her down, gave her kisses, told her we loved her, and left the room.

My husband set a timer for 5 minutes, and I went downstairs and put on headphones. Admittedly, I wasn't strong enough to listen to her cry but thankfully, my husband was able to. He went in after 5 minutes, patted her little belly and told her "night-night it's okay." Again after 10 minutes. Again after 15 minutes.

7 minutes after the 15 minute check-in, so 37 minutes over all, she fell asleep. On her own.

That night, she slept until 5am. I fed her. Said "night-night", put her back in her crib and left. She fussed for a few minutes but then fell asleep. My husband and I were in shock.

The next night, she fell asleep in 17 minutes and slept for 10 and a half hours. TEN AND A HALF HOURS!

And the next, 3 minutes. With no crying. 10 hours of sleep again.

It has been almost a month now and she goes to sleep every night after our bedtime story and a feeding, at 6pm. She sleeps through the night and doesn't wake up until she's hungry, usually between 4 and 5. And goed back to sleep for another 2 hours. She gets 12 hours of sleep every night. My husband and I feel like we've regained some of our sanity, let alone our marriage!

So yes, I know that sleep training is controversial. But I can honestly say that it changed our life! We're happier and better parents. And our daughter is well-rested and content. She's a joy to wake up to in the morning, all smiles and slobbery kisses.

It's always your choice. There is no right way. But it did work for us.

Just as a note: we did research sleep training effects on children. All of the research indicated that there were no long term negative consequences. I know there's other research that might say otherwise, and I respect that. For us, this was the right choice. I hope that if you're having sleep issues, you find the best solution for you and your baby!