How to regulate cycles while ttc?

Sometimes my cycles are 27 days, 35 days,  or over 40 days long! No apparent pattern either. I also get different flow rates from AF, including some very long and heavy until I end up anemic! I want to avoid fertility drugs as much as possible because the period after each bfn (while on progestin and the like) has been torturous. Any ideas? I'm searching for a doc who will work with me on alternatives, and I need some possible solutions to ask about.