So

a few weeks ago, I broke up with my boyfriend. we were together for a little over a year. i feel like shit, but i feel like i had good reasons to break up with him.

about a week after that happened, id been texting my guy friend who just moved back to the city, and we hung out a couple times and texted a lot, and cuddling turned to aggressive making out?? turned to him putting my hand on his dick and im like hmmm no. i shut it down, but we still continued to cuddle until we met up with a friend later.

im a bit at fault for that situation because i was just desperate for human contact, and i took advantage of his feelings for me.

after that i decided to make a tinder account! why? i dont know. i just want to chat with people and meet new people.

everything reminds me of my boyfriend. im still totally in love with him, i always have been, and i always will be. i had a crush on him for 2 years before i asked him out. i will just sob sometimes. how do you get over someone you love??

i know he probably hates me now, and wouldnt consider ever getting back together. i dont think we should get back together either. i will just feel lonely in that relationship. and we both need to grow up..

anyway.

TL;DR my main problem is: i want to start fresh and meet new people. but it takes me so long to be attracted to people and to trust them! when i made out with that guy, i felt noothiinngg...

idk man...