It's time to get better!
So, this week, 2 months after my miscarriage, i came to realize i've been kind of sabotaging myself. With everything that has happened, all the sadness, i let myself go. I mean, i dont really struggle with my weight, but i have been subconsciously rebelling in a way, i dont know if that makes sense... I realized i have been kind of neglecting myself, not eating well, not excercising. Why am i doing this to myself? It's like i dont care. It doesnt matter. I did everything perfect for my baby last year and i still lost him. Starting January 2014 I banned junk food, sodas, fried foods and excess sugar from my diet. I took my folic acid 6 months prior to conceiving, started drinking more water, i joined a yoga class... I was getting physically and mentally prepared for my baby. My blood tests were perfect! My virgo-perfectionist nature pushed me to be in the best health for my kid, I was going to do my best, just for him. But then i lost him. Just like that, no reason. At first i didnt eat much and then i started eating too much and eating anything. I felt out of control. Recently it just hit me. Like, what am i doing? I owe it to myself to be better, i owe it to my future rainbow baby to be healthy. This week i started taking my prenatals again, went back to my yoga (my therapy!) and started eating right again. Hopefully we will ttc next month, and i'm afraid of getting too excited. I admit i'm scared but i'm also happy. Sometimes I even find myself daydreaming about it. I think i may have caught myself on time so I can now steer in a better direction, i'm back on track. Wish me luck 😉
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