Broken into a million pieces

When your husband is sick (like medically sick) and you can't express your feelings to anyone but cry silent tears. When your family is breaking apart and you hurt so much that you cry silent tears. When you feel 2017 has been a series of unfortunate events and you seem to have no luck at all, you cry every night in silence so that no one knows how hurt you are. You continue the day by smiling with your husband and feeling sad from within. I feel broken in a million pieces. I can't talk to anyone.