Tired of not living.

Ive been with my husband for almost 9 years now.... Pregnant with our third. Everything would be great... If he loved me. But he doesnt. I dont know what real love is. He is pretty much withe bc i give him security. Well, i do know the love for my children... Which is AMAZING! But i wonder how it would feel to really be loved by a man.... Im an idiot. Just ranting and emotional... That is all.