Ok so here is the issue.  Thomas is a family name on my grandmothers side. I have like the name from day one and my husband liked the idea of calling him Tommy for short but really didn't like the idea of naming him Thomas. So we finally agreed to just name him Tommy. It still pays tribute to the family name and it keeps my husband happy too. Well we told my grandmother what we decided a couple weeks ago and though she didn't understand my husbands aversion to the name Thomas she seemed ok with the idea. Well last night I got a text saying that she feels it's disrespectful and that if we are not going to use the name the way it's meant to be then she doesn't want us using it at all.  Now I don't want to upset my grandmother but at this point we are attached to the name. I'm not really sure what I should do. My husband basically says to hell with that we're doing what we want to do and part of me wants to do the same but the other part doesn't want her to hate our choice.